115. Winning, Consistency And Sitting With Those Feelings

Speaker 1: 0:01

What's up everybody, welcome back to Never Stop Building. I'm your host, sam Kaufman, as always, happy, excited, grateful to be here sharing about things that I am passionate about with you, and I thank you for coming and listening to me and I probably sound like a lunatic half the time and I'm really okay with that. I just appreciate that you come and listen and support and I appreciate the messages, the texts, the DMs, the tagging. I really do appreciate it when you guys give value out of this podcast. This is episode, I think, 115. Most podcasts don't make it past episode six something like 90%. So making it past episode six puts you in the top 10%, which is wild. This is episode 115, and I do this. There's no ads on this show. This show is not big enough to have ads or revenue generation or anything like that.

Speaker 1: 0:52

This is, for me, it's like the purest form of content creation, because I really love to be able to share my thoughts in a long format spoken way, which can either be five minutes or 50. This is just my most unadulterated, like my favorite way of creating and documenting content, and so I appreciate each and every single one of you that supports and downloads and shares and texts me and says things about it and like, even when I asked, like you know, do you guys like the music? Like, for those of you that reached out to me and answered that question, thank you Obviously the overwhelming answer was keep the music out. Apparently, it's unanimous. People actually don't like intro music in podcasts, which is hilarious. I had somebody text me, you know, text me a joke about it and I realized like I hate intro music and podcasts and this is why I took it out was like part of creating this content, was part of creating content in general is, in the beginning, you kind of can come under this pressure to like compete with other people's content. So like, oh, podcasts have intro music, okay, reels have certain colored captions, and so, like you start doing things because you think other people like them more, kind of forgetting the reality that, like, the most sustainable form of doing anything content creation included is doing it the way that you like it the most, because if you enjoy what you're doing 100%, that's how you're going to create something that resonates with your audience 100%. And so I remember I was sitting there and I was like man, I don't even like it. And I was like, why do I have intro music? Why do I have intro music? I don't like intro music. I don't want to hear it on other people's podcasts. I would prefer they just get right to the point. I'm just getting right to the point. It's hilarious. I did not expect 100% of people to say, yes, we hate intro music. Thank you so much for doing that. Keep it out. So it's staying out Well done. Thank, staying out Well done. Thank you for the responses. I think that's awesome. You know I wanted to.

Speaker 1: 3:09

I wanted to talk about a few different things today, but I think like really and truly, what today is going to be, today's going to be a motivational episode for you, and the topic is you A lot of you are in positions of massive growth right now, whether you're in our win rate ecosystem right. We've got small business academy members in our group coaching program who are winning big right now. We have one-on-one clients in our program who are winning big. We have high-level clients who are winning big and there are people all over who are still struggling. But there's been a shift. It's been a market shift for a lot of people in business and people are winning right now and that winning is causing some insecurity and it's causing some fear-based decision-making trigger on some things that are scary and new and probably necessary in order to sustain whatever growth you're going to. So I just want to share a couple of things For those of you that are winning right now. So much content is created for like doing better, do more, do this, you're losing. It just gets exhausting.

Speaker 1: 4:43

This episode is for winners. It's for those of you who are winning, for those of you who have found success and continue to find success and continue to invest in yourself and continue to listen to podcasts and continue to absorb information. Continue to execute. This is for you, man or woman. This is for you. Do not continue to hesitate, avoiding making the decisions that need to be made to handle the growth that you are experiencing Now. I am not telling you to go and make every wild investment that you can possibly make.

Speaker 1: 5:18

One of the best pieces of mentorship advice I have ever heard somebody say to somebody was let's say, you're going from. You know we have clients that are going from $3 million in revenue to $12 million in a year. That's insane, wild, anomaly, year level growth. Well, we're not going to plan company strategy around $12 million being the sustainable model for next year. We're going to average that out and say, okay, so if we have an anomaly growth year, let's say we do seven next year. So let's say you're going from one to three this year, which is a ton of growth for a small business. Don't plan on five. The following year Plan on 2.5. Plan on sustainability at the 2.5 to 3.5 mark, because sometimes growth years have explosiveness and then the following year requires a reset of procedures and disciplines and behaviors and org charts. And this isn't to sound ultra businessy, but this is like.

Speaker 1: 6:23

What I'm trying to say is, for those of you that are winning at any certain level right now Do not let the fear of you screwing it all up prevent you from taking the necessary action to keep it sustainable. Okay, I get it. I know what it feels like to see massive success and then be afraid of your own shadow because you don't believe in yourself to maintain it, to sustain it, to live in it, to sit in it, to absorb it, to be it. But you did, you got it. Whatever it is, it's no different if we're talking about weight loss or fitness. I can't tell you how many times I had a check-in day with my coach and I had a two or three or one pound weight loss which is a big win on a weekly basis and that whole day I would struggle, feeling like I wanted to cheat on my diet.

Speaker 1: 7:26

Because there's this internal doubter that goes up when we start seeing wins and success, because sometimes we're afraid not of being successful, but of getting there and falling off the cliff. We're afraid of embarrassing ourselves, we're afraid of not being able to handle it, we're afraid of the added responsibility that comes with achieving that next level that we always wanted. We're afraid of the added responsibility that comes with achieving that next level that we always wanted. We're afraid of being the person that's required to continue to be successful. We're afraid that if anybody knew how many things we did wrong, they wouldn't believe that we are this. But we start becoming afraid of all of these things and it is required to become the next version of yourself so that you can maintain the next version of the life that you've built, the business that you've built, the health that you've built, the marriage that you're building, the kids that you're building, family, the structure, the culture. It is required to evolve, and people are so fixated on evolution when they're down. So many people reach out for help and mentorship when they're down that we often forget that.

Speaker 1: 8:43

The true evolution we learn the most from failure. There's no doubt about it. Failure is the best teacher. The biggest, biggest failures I've experienced have taught me the most lessons. But those lessons turn into evolutions when success shows back up, when we start winning again. That's where we have the ability to practically apply the lessons that we learned and evolve into that next person. But what a lot of people do is they enter into that next season of winning, because winning is cyclical, business is cyclical, weight loss is cyclical, relationships are cyclical. Things happen in seasons. There are seasons of big win, there are seasons of loss, there are seasons of pain, there are seasons of joy, there are seasons of it's really hard, there are seasons of it's really simple. That's just life. And when we go through the hard and we learn the lessons and we get into the simple, we get to apply all of what we learned and we have to evolve. Believe that the evolution that keeps things in a simple and joyful and peaceful place really takes place when we start winning.

Speaker 1: 9:57

Because so many people are afraid of and don't know how to handle winning. They've spent so much time just trying to not lose or survive that when all the work that they've done starts to bear fruit, they don't know what to do with the fruit. Well, we harvest it. And in order to harvest fruit now we have to build baskets and we need a little shed to keep the fruit in so it doesn't sit out in the sun. And then we need to wash it and we need to package it. And now there's new processes. You spent all this time toiling the soil and planting the seed and watering and watering and trying, and things growing and things dying, and now you're bearing fruit. And then you look around and you've got this orchard full of fruit and you don't know what to do with it. Now it's time that we learn to steward the fruits of our labor, and that means another evolution. But my suggestion, my urge to you, is to do that this calmly right.

Speaker 1: 10:54

I'm just coming out of a difficult season myself, in every category a difficult season, and in that difficult season, what the beautiful thing about evolving over these last couple of years and becoming this version of myself was? Your floor just continues to raise and so, like me at my worst two months ago was better than me at my best four years ago, because I don't need any external validation or circumstance or approval anymore to know that I'm okay or not. Okay I, I don't need that, it's all internal. And I knew, going through this difficult season, this difficult journey, these uncharted, unnavigated waters, I knew there was a winning season on the other side. I knew that because I've been through so many seasons of cyclical life and different buckets. I knew the winning season was coming.

Speaker 1: 12:00

And then you start to walk into it, right and in order. Now walking into it instead of panicking, instead of being super excited, instead of thinking, oh no, now it's just calmness again, calmness through the storm, calmness through the peace, because the storm is coming back and peace will come after it and it just happens like that. And so I don't have to act like this. New high is the new forever. And just like I didn't act like that new low was going to be low forever. And that's how you continue to have zero doubt that you're going to be okay on the other side of these winds that you may be experiencing, that you're going to be okay On the other side of these wins that you may be experiencing. That's how you're going to keep and maintain a level of confidence through what you're going through is by understanding that it is going to pass, good or bad.

Speaker 1: 12:45

But in order for good to pass in a way where you get to keep the fruit of the labor from the good, you have to make the decisions now to do the things necessary to respond to that right. You have to make the decisions to respond to that winning in a healthy way, just like the weight loss analogy during the check-in day, sometimes, when I have a really good check-in and all of a sudden my brain goes into temptation mode about eating garbage. It's a combination of like well, you did it, so you can do this, and that's what we do. We do that in so many areas. We do that in so many areas where we overcome temptation, we get over, we evolve, we do something really, really hard and then we think, all right, well, cool, I did it, so now I can do a little right.

Speaker 1: 13:31

And maybe not everyone can resonate with that right, I'm a recovering addict, so like, maybe maybe that's specific to people with addictive tendencies and the disease of addiction and addictive personalities, but I know for myself personally, like that's something I've always struggled with was like when I am consistent and see fruit from my consistency, the temptation to be inconsistent shows up. Now, instead of listening to the temptation to be inconsistent because that's what happens when the wind starts showing up people become tempted to no longer do the activity that got to the wind to begin with, but the activity that got you to the wind to begin with is the only thing that's going to keep winning coming right. Going to keep winning coming is to continue to be consistent with that activity. And so if you're in that season and you are winning and you are feeling imposter syndrome, you are feeling doubt, you don't believe in yourself and you are struggling with temptation to be inconsistent, sit still, grab a journal, journal about your thoughts, your feelings, your temptations. Sit still. I think one of the most impactful things that I have learned to do in this recent season of my life is sit still. And I am a doer, I am a checklist guy, I am a productivity guy, I have bordered on workaholic my entire life Not healthy, don't do that. But learning to sit still has just created this ability to sit through feelings and thoughts, both good, you know, comfortable and uncomfortable, and not have to make decisions based on those tiny moments of feeling, emotion and temptation right. So sit still, journal about your feelings, get the things in your head out of your head.

Speaker 1: 15:24

I was just telling my teenage daughter my daughter has to make a decision and it's hard and it's probably her first biggest, hardest decision. And we're making her make it and we're making her commit to it. If that's the decision either way, she's committing to it. If that's the decision that's committed Either way, she's committing. And I could watch her.

Speaker 1: 15:48

It was so hard and so hard and I had to tell her at one point. She was like repeating information over and over and over again. I said, hey, there is no new information that you're going to come to right. It's just like sales For those of you that know some sales tactics, higher level. There's no new information. Thinking about the same information for longer is not going to help you come to a better decision. You have all of the information. I told her. You have all the information. You are at the decision-making point of this process.

Speaker 1: 16:23

Obsessing over existing information is not going to help you. It's time to make a decision and I was just helping her understand this consistency that comes on the other side of this is going to be good for her, but first she has to sit still sit in the discomfort of the anxiety of decision making, of commitment. And I told her, I said this is going to be uncomfortable during this process of deciding, but you can't escape the discomfort. You have to sit in it, you have to own it, journal about it, pray about it, own what you're feeling, own those triggers, trust what's happening, but get it out of your head and then make a decision Point being learn to sit in the feelings journal and get it out of your head and then continue consistency in the areas at which led to the winning that you're already experiencing. Thank you, guys. Talk to you next week.